Scientific Joke

I don't know. I just spent the whole day trying to recreate the circumstances from this morning, but nothing's happening. The blankets, the lighting, my position, all the same, but I couldn't make myself float. I tried rocking back and forth, like I was on the swings, trying to imagine the way it felt. I tried alcohol, weed, a parade of over the counter narcotics and then all of them in combination, but nothing seems to make me tired in just the right way. I'm sure it's not a hallucination or a dream, but I don't have any way to prove it except my own memory, and after all the narcotics, who'd believe that?

What are the odds that one guy, a loser like me, is going to break with all of the established laws of physics? Newton's way smarter than me. He did experiments and math, and proved how gravity works. Then Einstein came along and said gravity could work another way, and he proved it even better, but neither of them would ever believe I was above that bed without falling.

Anyway, I get to play with the iPhone now. I'm not sure why people are so excited about this thing. It's very shiny, but now that I have it, I don't know what I'll really do with it that I couldn't do before.