Ain't Technology Grand?

I found an article today about a flying suit, or whatever. It think I could use one to get more power and control. It's really for parachuting, but as long as I can maintain my altitude or even go up a little bit, it'll help.

Actually, this isn't too different to what I do. I fly along, not really up or down for most of the trip. It's more like gliding, but maybe I wouldn't have to concentrate as much, and I could thing about other things while I'm flying.

In other news, I'm getting really good at martial arts. I went to a couple more lessons, and I got all these kicks and things. It's really formal. I don't know how much it would help in a street fight, but I feel way stronger, so that's good. Also, if I try and fight with one of the flying suits on, the wings are going to get in the way, but if I'm going to be a superhero, I'm gonna have to have these skills, right?

I Am Iron Man

Wow. I just saw the trailer for Iron Man, and it looks totally freakin' sweet. I gotta get me one of those suits. It would totally help me fight crime and supervillains and stuff.

I'd have super strength. I'd be bulletproof. I'd have freakin' flame throwers in my hands and jets in my feet. I wouldn't have to do anything to fly, just press a button. I'm all about that.

Really, I just want some heavy metal. Get it, because of the song.

Oh, I just looked at the bottom of the page. It turns out I'm only 25% Iron Man, whatever that means. Again, I think it's because there was no question about being a millionaire. I should write a quiz like that, and it'd be way better. I should do a lot of stuff.

I got this workout equipment online. I set it up last week and started using it. I can already feel myself getting stronger. I can lift more now than I could last week, but it hurts. I guess that's the price of being a superhero. Tony Stark went through a lot of pain before he became Iron Man. I can do a little of it, too.

Missed Labor Day, etc.

I didn't go to my martial arts class today. I just didn't feel like it. Instead, I wandered around the house, going through a bunch of old stuff. I'll go next week.

I found one of my parents' scrapbooks. I spent like an hour looking at all the news articles they clipped about themselves. They did all kinds of shit I never even heard about. They made those people who subscribe for an African kid look like Nazi puppy-stranglers. I mean, they did a lot of good stuff.

I have to admit, it successfully made me feel a little guilty. I'm rich. I'm bored. I should be doing good samaritan stuff. I'm hobbling around here, feeling sorry for myself. I was so bored today, I didn't even feel like flying, and that's the only thing I really do thats fun. Feeling guilty is no good reason to do something, but if there's already a reason to, and it pushes you in the right direction, I guess that's not so bad.

Pain Again

I guess I spoke too soon. My knees have been hurting all day. Clearly, I have no miraculous healing abilities. Maybe my imagination got away from me on that one.

Maybe I'm taking this whole thing too seriously. I don't really want to be a superhero. Uncle Ben's all like "With great power comes great responsibility," but my power isn't really that great. All I can do is fly around a little. Lots of people do plenty of heroic things without ever setting foot off the ground, but all I do is sit up here and stare at my computer. I'm not super at all. Today, I can barely walk. What's gonna happen if I try and fight crime or save the world or something?

I have no great anger with the criminals of society, no vendetta on a supervillain. I don't hate anybody, so why should I have to fight?

Good News, Bad News

Sweet! Good news, my right knee's better. It started really hurting this afternoon, but in a different way than it had been. I massaged it for a while and went about my business. About an hour ago, it just stopped hurting completely. I wonder if I have some kind of miraculous healing ability or anything. That would be awesome.

It's a little tired right now, because I started doing all these roundhouse kicks that I learned in class. The left knee still hurts a little, but that was never the bad one, maybe because I'm right handed and I tend to lead with my right foot. Anyway, I don't want to test the whole healing factor thing, because it would hurt, probably, but the next time I get hurt, I'll have to remember to pay attention to it.

Of course, there's bad news too. I got this thing for my iphone. It's supposed to charge it from a battery. I thought it'd be cool, because if I'm flying all around, I might not always be close to an outlet to plug it in. It doesn't work. It's crap. I waited until the phone was almost dead and put it on. It looked like it was doing something, and I did keep talking on it for a while, then I let it charge for like three hours. The little blue light kept flashing, but the battery level never went up, and then it died. That's bullshit, because I was all excited about this thing, and it didn't work. I hope my phone still works. I haven't plugged it in yet. I can't remember if I backed up my contacts. Hm.

Wherever They Lurk

Okay, it's possible I was too optimistic about the whole supervillain thing. The odds are, she's just some chick. I've yet to meet an actual human being who has the patience and drive to be evil the way they are in the movies. I've known people who talked about it, but it's always talk.

You know how I know she's not a supervillain? I asked her. Sometimes the simplest solutions are the best. I totally texted her about it for like ten minutes. If there's one thing I know about supervillains, it's that they can't stop talking about their diabolical plans for world domination and shit like that. Oh, well. Tell the truth, I think that was what I liked best about her. Eh, easy come, easy go.

In the mean time, I signed up for a martial arts class. It's only once a week, and the instructor seems pretty chill, so hopefully I can stick with it for a while. I think it's important for superheroes to have those kinds of skills, right? Otherwise, I'll never be able to beat up the bad guys, whenever they show up. At the very least, I can learn how to tuck or something when I land, and that'll help.